Three's a Crowd
by Ardent Ly
Summary: Just as Neji's mouth enclosed over hers, Sakura heard the door creak open and seconds later unexpectedly felt the chill of a familiar chakra shoot through her spine. Suddenly, volunteering to host the CPR classes didn't seem like such a good idea. Sasu-Saku-Neji


Summary: Just as Neji's mouth enclosed over hers, Sakura heard the door creak open and seconds later unexpectedly felt the chill of a familiar chakra shoot through her spine. Suddenly, volunteering to host the CPR classes didn't seem like such a good idea. Sasu-Saku-Neji

Disclaimer: I do not own _Naruto_ or any related plots of characters.

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 **Three's a Crowd**

 **By Ardent Ly**

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The night was alive as the Konoha 11 filled the infamous Ichiraku. Team Asuma had just recently returned from an eight-month mission in Cloud and Ino—being Ino—demanded a grand party celebrating their triumphant homecoming. It didn't quite work out as expected when, due to insufficient planning and Naruto's insistence, they all ended up at Ichiraku on a Friday night. However, with free-flowing alcohol, great food, and the irritating demon-container's loud mouth being occupied with said great food, it really was proving to be a great night.

"Too bad the teme isn't here," Naruto commented through a mouthful of noodles. "He needs to start going out more."

"W-where is he, N-Naruto-kun?" Hinata asked softly, sneaking her slices of eggplant tempura onto her boyfriend's plate, knowing how much he liked them. Her face lit up when he swiped a sliver of eggplant with an expert twiddle of his chopsticks and took a bite before offering her the other half. Accepting it with her heart pounding joyously, the white-eyed heiress' cheeks were deeply flushed as she nibbled on the side.

He smiled at her stammered gratitude. "He's on a solo mission somewhere in the Land of Snow. Not sure about the details though…ANBU confidentiality or whatever."

"When is Uchiha coming back?" Shikamaru inquired. The two geniuses had formed a rather odd friendship when Sasuke had earned the Nara clansman's respect after casually defeating him in shogi.

"The teme said his mission was going to last a few weeks, so he should be back by the end of the month," Naruto informed him, much to Shikamaru's disappointment. It was difficult finding a worthy opponent in shogi.

"That's around the same time Neji-san will be returning home," Lee added, taking a generous, though neat, slurp of his noodles. "He's in the Land of Waves doing some diplomatic work for Hokage-sama."

"Well, wherever they are, thank Kami they're not together. Who knows how much damage they could cause if they got into one of their spats," Choji interjected. The feud between the Sasuke and Neji was a well-known fact among the people in the Konoha, even among the civilians. Frankly, given their outward dislike of one another, it was a quiet, though shared, belief that their absence tonight was for the better.

"You got that right," Naruto agreed, sharing another eggplant slice with a red-faced Hinata.

"With the way those two go at each other, maybe one of 'em'll succeed in pulling the stick out of the other's ass!" Kiba hooted, slamming his full glass onto the table in hysterics. The others all laughed boisterously, clinking their glasses together. The amusement on their faces faded, however, when Naruto's howls were cut off by a succession of hoarse coughing.

"Shit, Naruto, are you all right?" Kiba questioned loudly. Instantly, a hush fell over the party as everyone turned towards the small group. The stunned ninjas looked on as the blond responded with frantic shakes of his head. His usually carefree face was quickly growing into an alarming shade of red and then a violent purple while his hands gripped and clawed at his throat. "Fuck, he's choking! Someone help!" Those closest to the poor boy began scrambling around like headless chickens, hollering for water and making an overall ruckus while Naruto continued his struggle to breathe. Others had frozen in their place, looking highly stricken but clueless.

Adrenaline pulsing through her veins, Sakura, sitting with Tenten in one of the small tables Teuchi-san had specially set up for tonight, rushed towards her choking friend, using minimal strength to push away the small crowd surrounding him. "Move! Don't crowd him! I said, move, damn it!" At her thunderous tone, everyone backed away, creating a wide semi-circle around the two members of Team Kakashi.

Situating herself behind him with one leg between his and her arms around him just above his hipbones, Sakura went into action. She balled her right hand into a tight fist, covered it with her left, and began forcefully pushing in and up his stomach in a steady rhythm. "Come on, Naruto, cough it up!" She urged him. With two more deep abdominal thrusts, Naruto gave a great heave, dislodging the semi-chewed fish ball from his throat and sending it flying into one of the many glasses lining the counter. A faint grimace from Shino made it clear just whom it belonged to.

Hunched over with his hands on his knees, Naruto began taking great gulps of air before gratefully accepting a glass of water from a teary-eyed Hinata. The frightening puce colour his face had taken on had thankfully returned to its normal rosy tan, much to everyone's relief. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, Sakura-chan!" He exclaimed as he recovered, sweeping his best friend up in his arms. "You saved my life!" He peppered a smacking kiss on her cheek.

Her heart finally returning to its usually pace, she return his hug with a vengeance. "You stupid dobe," she admonished weakly. "Don't you ever scare me like that again, you hear me?" Their friends came forward and began offering their own sighs of relief and admiring pats on the back for the night's hero.

"Great job, Sakura-chan!" Tenten praised. She pushed a shot glass filled to the brim with deceivingly clear liquid into her hand, urging the pink-haired woman to throw it back. Smiling politely, Sakura set it down without even a sip, remembering that she had an early meeting the following morning.

"Yeah, I don't know what I would have done without you!" Naruto exclaimed sheepishly, discreetly pushing the rest of the fish balls in his ramen to the side. "Three cheers for Sakura-chan!" The noodle stand erupted with more noise as they hailed their hero of the evening and the rest of the night continued on without further incident.

The light mood evaporated the following day when the present members of the Kohona 11 were summoned into the Hokage Residence the very next afternoon. Puzzled at the request and slightly irritated given that some had still not recovered from last night's events, they were ushered into the Hokage's office where they found Tsunade sitting behind her desk, peering out at them with slightly narrowed eyes and folded hands covering half her face. Behind her, Sakura stood tall and proud with her hands tucked into her lab coat. She offered none of her usual smiles or greetings as her friends filed in, only increasing the suspense in the room. When all the shinobi were standing before her in a three-line formation, Tsunade dropped her hands to reveal a set glare on her youthful face and an audible gulp rippled through the sea of nin.

"It recently come to my attention that many of my top shinobi lack basic knowledge of first aid training…and quite frankly, I am _appalled_ at how you all handled yourselves during the situation." Tsunade snarled, shooting daggers at them. A few cringed as she berated them, having the sense to hang their heads in shame, while others shot accusing scowls of their own at Sakura for ratting them out. "This is something I would expect from a group of civilians maybe, but fully trained shinobi who are all at jounin level or higher? This is unacceptable!" The raging Hokage slammed her fist onto the desk before her, leaving behind a shallow crater in the shiny wood. "You all better damn well be _grateful_ that this little incident didn't occur during a mission or it could have been a dead teammate you were hauling into my office instead of a loud idiot who can't chew his food!" Naruto squeaked and paled at the realization.

Tsunade fell back into her chair, rubbing the bridge of her nose in an irritated manner. "Since you've all clearly forgotten your basic survival training, I've decided to implement mandatory first aid training courses. Everyone will be attending them—no exceptions. I've already made note in all your files that you can't be assigned any missions until I have written confirmation from Sakura and her team of trained nurses that you've not only attended, but _passed_ these courses. Failure to comply will result in the immediate stripping of your rank and you'll be pulled back down to genin." Eyes tightening further at the disbelieving and slack-jawed expressions of her audience, she continued in a menacingly low voice, "If you can't handle the basics, you have no business being a Konoha nin. Dismissed." She released them with a careless wave of her hand.

The disgraced shinobi trailed out of her cramped office and most avoided meeting Sakura's eye as she stood unflinchingly by the Hokage's side. Kiba, who was still nursing a throbbing headache and was now thoroughly annoyed with the prospect of extra classes, glowered at her as he walked by. Sakura responded in turn with a sneer much too reminiscent of her mentor's own scowl, making him quick to back down.

And so there they all were the next morning, filed in a medical training room located in the hospital.

"Good morning, everyone," She called out sweetly. Low grumbles and half-hearted greetings were her only replies save Lee's ever exuberant, "Good morning, Sakura-san!" Sighing in irritation, she rested on the edge of the desk at the front of the room, crossing her arms in the attempt to look intimidating. "Given the incident that sparked these necessary classes, I thought it all too appropriate to begin our classes with the Heimlich Manoeuvre. I'll be instructing you all on how to perform the procedure with a number of situations in mind." Sharp eyes looked around the small room of students. "We'll start off first with the basic procedure with the assumption that your victim is an adult. Note that the procedures on babies, young children, and pregnant women are slightly different, but we'll get to those sometime later this week. Now, would anyone like to volunteer to be my assistant for a demonstration?"

Tenten readily stood up and allowed Sakura to go through the steps of the Heimlich Manoeuvre with her, and after a thorough demonstration, the nurse had them all pair up to practice. They had encountered very little problems at first, the most recurring being Hinata's propensity to faint every time Naruto placed his arms around her to attempt the manoeuver. After the fourth fainting spell, Sakura deigned it better that Hinata and Tenten exchanged partners, which later proved to be the worst idea ever because of Lee's over-enthusiasm and desire to impress his instructor. That class had ended with Naruto's ribs being sorely bruised, Kiba nearly wetting himself in laughter, and the vein in Sakura's large forehead growing to unusual proportions.

"How did I do, Sakura-sensei?" Lee inquired hopefully after class.

With a sigh, she examined the checklist on her clipboard. "You did very well, Lee-san," she assured him. Technically, he had done all the steps correctly and even aced the written portion of the class, so there really wasn't a reason why he couldn't have passed. "Just remember to be a little more light-handed next time, ne? We want to be able to clear the victim's airway, but we don't want to have to send them to the hospital for broken ribs." With a final nod in understanding, Lee scampered off to his "beloved, youthful Tenten" to share the good news.

After that trying class, Sakura realized that she simply couldn't go on teaching without seriously maiming some of her friends and so dispensed her colleagues to administer the other classes. From the reports she had gotten, her friends had all done well in the allergy treatment class and the basic burn treatment lesson, with the exception of Kiba who, again, decided to be the class clown and went about insulting the other nin and then jokingly asking, "Would you like some aloe for that burn?" Unimpressed, Sakura had failed him for that portion and sent him off, smirk and all, to his new instructor—Tsunade-sama, herself.

"Kami, is it that time already?" Sakura stretched her arms far above her head, sighing contentedly as her joints popped. She had just finished signing the passing grades for her friends' final lesson, CPR, and was more than ready to go home. "Did I buy groceries this week? Hmm…better stop by for some food on my way…maybe I'll be able to get some actual sleep tonight…" She delighted in the prospect as she gathered her belongings. Three shift raps on her door interrupted her musings. "Come in."

Neji stepped through the door soundlessly and she was quick to note the mud caking his sandals and the slight distress of his ANBU uniform. "I was instructed by Hokage-sama to report to you right after our debriefing," he said, smoothly slipping into one of the chairs in front of her desk.

Sakura replaced her scrolls and backpack back onto her desk and sighed again, this time out of resignation. _So much for going to bed._ "Welcome back, Neji-kun. And yes, you're required to go through some basic first aid training classes. Tsunade-sama felt that many of our highest-ranking nin were, um, lacking in this area and so for your sake and your team's, you'll have to re-learn some of the fundamentals."

Neji's eyebrows sprung up, hiding behind his forehead protector. "What the hell happened while I was gone?"

Sakura eyed him wearily. "I'll give you one guess,"

He smirked. "Uzumaki?"

"Ding ding ding, we have a winner! Looks like you've got a brain under that lovely head of hair after all, Hyuuga," she teased, unsure exactly where her flirty side had emerged from. "Anyways, if you have the time now, we can start with the CPR lesson since we still have the test dummies in the storage room. You have a lot to catch up on." Before she could even push her chair back, however, a warm hand grabbed her right above her elbow.

"Nara had informed me that they were given the opportunity to practise on one another," He told her, a hint of a smirk on his face.

Sakura arched one slender pink eyebrow. So, he had known all along why he was sent to her. "Is that so? Well, did Nara tell you that it was because Kiba complained about 'making out with plastic men'? I'm sure you'll prove to be much more mature," She insisted, though there was a playful tone of scepticism.

He halted her once more, surprising her when his hand travelled from her elbow down to her wrist. "Do you not think it best, Haruno, to train me through a live demonstration? I don't believe any victims will be as compliant as a test dummy, after all, and I do believe I would much prefer hands-on training." Flirty Neji wasn't nearly as disarming now as he was a few months ago. She had nearly swallowed her tongue one evening when he had requested to accompany her to dinner after her eighteen-hour shift. Befuddled but not unwilling, they had had a pleasant night out that climaxed into a sweet peck turned full-on make out on her front porch.

He had made his interest in her more than clear that night, but even after a few months of casual dating and more stolen kisses, they had never established any formal titles between them. Ino and Tenten, frustrated at their friends' slow progress, used every open opportunity to push them together, even going to far as to barricade them inside Ino's guest room during one of her many get-togethers and threatening to keep them in there until they made "sweet Hyuuga babies." Neither Naruto nor Sasuke ( _kami,_ especially Sasuke) had been too impressed with their sly plans and promptly attempted to release her. Their distaste had skyrocketed to downright murderous when they finally managed to break into the room about half an hour later—Ino and Tenten had both put up a hell of a fight trying to keep them out for as long as possible—to find their pink-haired teammate accompanied by the Hyuuga clansman on the all-too inviting bed.

"Nothing happened!" She had insisted frustratingly after Naruto had loudly accused Neji of "defiling their precious Sakura-chan." "We just talked!"

"Hn," the Uchiha heir replied, eyeing the Byakugan-wielder distrustfully from across the room. "I'm sure that's not all he wanted." Despite her continued assertion of an innocent exchange, her teammates had refused to leave her side the rest of the party, making it an exasperating night for her.

Their aggravating treatment of her continued the next night when Sakura was treated to an unexpected surprise and Sasuke had appeared at her office just before three in the morning. "If you need someone to walk you home at night, just ask me, not that stupid Hyuuga," he had demanded after sweeping up her bag and scrolls into his arms. If she hadn't known any better, Sakura would have accused the Uchiha of being jealous of Neji, but she didn't voice her thoughts. Instead, she had fought with him nearly all the way home, insisting that she didn't _need_ anyone to pick up after her overnight shifts. Sakura smiled secretly to herself, remembering that he had dismantled her argument with a simple, "Don't be annoying, Sakura," before lacing his free hand with hers. They walked the rest of the way home hand-in-hand and her heart beating out a samba in her chest.

Shaking her head slightly, she returned her focus back to the man in front of her, flushing away any thoughts of Sasuke and his confusing handholding. "Okay, Neji-kun, let's begin. I trust that you won't need to take notes?" He shook his head, his free-flowing hair following his movements. "Excellent. So, to start, if you find an unconscious victim, the first thing you're going to want to do is alert a medic. It's always best to have a trained professional assess the situation before going in and doing it yourself, but if the medic on your team is unavailable or you're on your own or you're simply pressed for time, it will be up to you to attempt to revive the victim." Her student nodded briskly, his face donning a serious mask. "All right, so for the sake of this class, we're going to assume that you're on a solo mission or something and you've come across a lifeless victim." A shriek of alarm escaped her when she suddenly felt her legs sweep out from under her. "Neji, what the hell do you think you're doing!"

The look of innocence he offered was not convincing in the least. "I was under the impression that the victim had to be laying down before commencing the CPR process," He stated simply. While she appreciated his clear enthusiasm, she couldn't help but the flush that painted her cheeks as he cradled her in his muscled arms before gently laying her flat on the floor. "What next, Dr. Haruno?"

Trying to collect her thoughts, Sakura supressed a heavy sigh. It was going to be an interesting night.

Sasuke stalked down the hospital halls, irritated that he had to attend a stupid class when all he wanted was to go home, have a simple supper and quick shower before slipping into bed. The only consolation was that it was being hosted by Sakura. He smirked at the thought of being alone with her, a rare feat lately given their hectic schedules and all too sociable circle of friends. Not to mention that infuriating Hyuuga's interferences.

He was aware of the Hyuuga's fascination with the medic, as did the whole freakin' village, and just the thought of him and Sakura together made him unconsciously grind his teeth. Sasuke may not have been the best friend—hell, not even the best teammate—but he was determined to show Sakura that he could be a good potential lover. He had realized one lonely night after a customary dinner with Team Kakashi that there was no one in the world he wanted to even consider spending the rest of his life with other than Sakura, and he would be damned before he allowed that pompous Hyuuga to get his hands on her. The night Loud Blonde Number Two and the Bun-Haired Chick had locked _his_ Sakura in with Hyuuga had only served to solidify his quest to ensure that Sakura's feelings for him had not changed.

Suddenly feeling much more eager, he quickened his pace to her office. He could feel her familiar chakra as he drew closer. "Sakura," he called out, pushing the door open. He didn't like what he saw—not one bit.

"How am I doing so far?"

Sakura's green eyes rolled in irritation as Neji pushed down on her chest with minimal force, clearly afraid that he would harm her. "Neji, you're going to have to push down harder than that if you want to revive your victim. Now, try again with your arms straightened and be sure to have your hands a little higher. You want to do your compressions around the centre of the sternum."

The Hyuuga didn't hesitate this time, positioning his hands accordingly and pushing down with more force. Sakura hummed in approval. "There you go, Neji. Do you feel the difference now?"

"I do, Sakura-sensei," he replied with a tone laced with friendly mocking. "Now, I believe I'm supposed to start breathing into the victim's mouth." Neji lowered himself until he was hovering just over her mouth.

Unconsciously reddening, Sakura placed a gentle hand on his chest to push him away. "Yes, but first you need to place the victim's head back and lift the chin to open the airway and determine if they are breathing. Pinch the nostrils and also check to ensure that they have nothing in their mouths that could impede their breathing." She waited patiently as he examined her mouth, trying to ignore the way he seemed to linger on her bottom lip. "Well? How is the victim's breathing?"

"I believe that the victim is thoroughly breathless, Haruno-sensei." Neji smirked. "Time to perform the procedure." He pinched her nostrils and placed two fingers under her chin to elevate her head as instructed. Without hesitation, he placed his mouth on her and breathed into her, watching her chest rise through his efforts.

The door creaked opened slowly. "Sakura?"

Sakura heard the door creak open and seconds later unexpectedly felt the chill of a familiar chakra shoot through her spine. She turned her head and mentally groaned as she saw Sasuke, his eyes widening perceptibly as he took in the scene before him.

Sasuke stood frozen by the door, disbelieving what he was seeing. Hyuuga hovering over Sakura. Hyuuga's hands on Sakura's chest. Hyuuga kissing Sakura. _Hyuuga_ kissing _Sakura_! Sasuke's eyes flashed crimson as his Sharingan activated, tomoe spinning erratically and glaring at his smirking rival.

"Ah, welcome, Uchiha. Sakura was just showing me how to perform CPR. Feel free to retrieve a test dummy and follow along," Neji said condescendingly, adjusting his position over the exasperating doctor so that his hands were more intimately pressed against her.

"Like hell!" Her old teammate snarled in return, rushing towards them.

Before Sakura could berate them for acting so juvenile, Neji has swept her up once more and had them across the room and away from the enraged Sasuke. "Going to have to be quicker than that, Uchiha," Neji taunted.

Sakura rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. _I need a vacation._

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Hello, friends! Long time, no post, I know. Life got in the way, unfortunately, but I'm hoping to start writing more. I found this little gem in the depths of my laptop and after a few edits, decided to share it. Just a fun little story that I don't believe I will continue, but I've said that before so who knows, really. I'm so out of practice, so please let me know what you think! Also tell me, are you Team Sasuke or Team Neji?

Also, please note that for the sake of the story, I may have omitted or changed certain aspects of any of the medical procedures listed here. **Please, please, please DO NOT follow the instructions listed in this story if you are going to perform the actual procedure.** This is a work created solely for entertainment, not to educated. If you would like to learn more about any of the procedures listed in this story, please ask your doctor or check online for instructional videos/websites that will be much more reliable. Thank you.

Best,

Ardie


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